Neptune Direct: Refuge

“Our refuge is being exactly where we are – not dramatizing problems by replaying them in our heads, telling stories to our friends, eliciting sympathy and convincing ourselves that this is a very big deal. Our refuge is in the stillness of being the compassionate witness to our panic and fear – not judging it as good or bad, just accepting the what is of the moment.” ― Charlotte Kasl

Effective Dates
: November 26th, 2018- June 22nd, 2019

Helios on Neptune Direct: You know what really pisses me off about this past year? Not just the morons and kleptocrats running the various world governments, the continued inaction on climate change that will lead us to a firey and miserable death, or even the endless retrogrades that have made us all chain-smoking insomniacs who haven’t slept right in about a decade- No, its that with all that and plenty more, I haven’t experienced a single, fleeting moment of peace. Hell, I had just laid down to sleep after a truly shit day when inspiration struck to write this- No rest for the wicked I suppose….That’s down to Neptune, in the end.

Yep, Neptune- The King of the Seas, The Earth-Shaker and the grand cosmic drunk is going direct, finally. During his retrograde in Pisces (he’s not even halfway done yet, by the way) he really put us through it, didn’t he? Dragging us into the depths of our insecurity and pain and making us feel like worthless sacks of shit was the move, apparently. So what will this direct do? Well, unfortunately, it won’t exactly be better- only more. You see, the big thing that we are going to deal with now is the one thing that Neptune can NEVER accept- Limits. You have seen the worst of what you can do to yourself, and are already at your low point. This is not a good place that you have brought yourself to. The question is whether you will sink lower under Neptune’s Riptide, or if you will call this your limit and rise above, getting back on your true path.

That choice is of course up to you, as all of the choices are now. Shocking no one, this is also a Neptune lesson- You are going to have to come to terms with the choices you have made to get yourself to this point. Reactionary or not, justified or not, they were yours to make and you have no one to blame for the consequences but yourself. This will be a hard lesson, and it is one of acceptance. Think of this as spiritual rehab. You cannot move on until you accept where you are now. Make peace with your unholy past so that you can find your respite. Forgive yourself, no matter how monstrous your crimes are to yourself. Find a way.

There is a palpable sense of loneliness and isolation that pervades your consciousness. I need you to not try and retreat within yourself because you think you’re not worthy of love, or of someone else’s help or care. Please do not isolate yourself from those who love you due to your own misguided feelings of shame- Especially if they see you struggle and are honestly, earnestly trying to help. This world is so cruel and harsh that anyone who can step outside of their own bubble and dramas to help another that they see struggling is rare and so, so important. Give them a chance, let them into your world. If they don’t come to you, reach out. Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need from your support network, supporting you is literally what they are there for! Just make sure that you are there for them when they need you too- It has to go both ways, or else you become the toxic one. Be on guard for your own worst tendencies and keep them in check.

Now, I know that there are a great many of you walking around shell-shocked, having been hit with disaster after disaster in a row; and you’re trying to list through the days without letting them drag you under. Sometimes that’s honestly all you can manage to do- there’s no shame in it. You are wandering around like zombies in the mist, waiting for THE DIVINE INSPIRATION TO MAKE IT ALL MAKE SENSE. Well, guess what, that’s not happening. Sorry. You find meaning and purpose in the continuation of the path. There is no moment where it makes sense and everything clicks. Sorry to burst your bubble. Neptune wants you to figure it out from the scraps lying by the side of the road, and you’re not going to find ANY meaning if you just stay stuck, waiting for it to fall from the heavens at your feet. Get to steppin’

For the record, you are completely allowed to be in pain right now. You are allowed to hurt. You are allowed to feel like everything is too much and if one more thing goes wrong it will collapse the dam in your heart that is holding back all the pain from spilling out into your life, drowning all the good in it. You are allowed to cry hot tears of sorrow and rage and disappointment. What you are NOT allowed to do is wallow in those feelings and allow them to hold you back or stop you. You have so much to see, so much to do, and you’re doing amazing- I promise you, you are fantastic. Please just get up and try, just one more time. Give it one last shot- this time, give it everything you have.

I promise you won’t regret it.

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